A Parent's Nightmare

Hayley Hoffman

Writing 1133

A Parent’s Nightmare

How would you react if your child was brutally beat to death because of who they are? Matthew Shepard was born in Wyoming on December 1, 1976. Although shy at first, he was actually quite the people person. The Matthew Shepard Foundation bio explains that Matthew “made friends easily and actively fought for the acceptance of all people.” Matt’s passion for equality led him to be elected as a peer counselor and later to join the gay and lesbian group on his college campus, the University of Wyoming in Laramie. Matthew Shepard was the victim of a hate crime because of his sexual orientation. His parents’, Dennis and Judy Shepard, reaction, however, truly represents the belief that even light can be found in something miserably dark.

Although some claim that gay people choose their sexual orientation, research supports the idea that one’s biology can strongly effect their orientation. According to the popular website, Evidence for God, “it has been hypothesized that homosexuality may result from a differential hormone balance in the wombs of those who eventually exhibit a homosexual orientation.” These findings explain that essentially, Matthew’s identity was determined in the womb. It was by chance that Matthew and thousands of others were born gay. Therefore, Dennis and Judy Shepard’s son was killed for something out of his own control.

According to the bartender, Matt was minding his own business at the bar on October 7^th when suddenly he noticed two men talking to him. Little did the bartender know that when the three left, as told through The Matthew Shepard Foundation, “Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson lead him to a remote area east of Laramie, Wyoming.” Matthew was then tied to a fence and severely beaten. He was left unconscious for over 18 hours when a bicyclist stumbled upon his body. Matthew Shepard died at the Poudre Valley Hospital on October 12 at 12:53 a.m. (source 1)

When Matt remained in the hospital for those days before his death, people across the nation and the world, parents just like you, sent their condolences to Dennis and Judy. The horrific incident controlled the media for multiple days and families followed the story with great sorrow for the Shepards. As the doctors updated the media with Matthew’s health, they also conveyed his parents’ gratitude to those supporting them during the unjust time.

One doctor confessed what he was feeling when he broke down crying during a press conference. He stood before numerous cameras updating the world on Matthew’s health, when he paused and began to sob. The doctor told the interviewers of The Laramie Project, that he thought of his own daughters and his own family and how precious they are to him, having seen the Shepard family shatter in front of his eyes. He, along with the thousands of parents following the story, felt an immense amount of sorrow for Dennis and Judy. These parents were forced to step away from their opinions of homosexuality and become deeply grateful for their families, for their children.

After the court found the two men guilty, Dennis Shepard presented a powerful speech in response to the debate of Aaron McKinney’s punishment. Thirteen months after the death of his son, he conveyed how extremely upset and emotional he still was about the incident. He explained to the courthouse how Matthew had to pay the price of opening their eyes to hate occurring in Laramie, America and the world. He expressed frustration because his son wanted to make a difference. Matthew overcame obstacles that many could not in his short lifetime. He was strong and even if he cried on the inside, he put on a smile. Dennis described that although his son did not look like a winner, he acted like one. And he confessed the guilt he felt now that his son would not be back, wondering how he could have been a better father. Yet, he also expressed how proud he was to be to be Matt’s dad, and how grateful he was to have such an amazing son. Although he stated that he would love to see nothing more than those who killed his son to die, too, he declared he would grant them life. Dennis’ reasoning was for Matthew. He looked the men in the eyes and said that every time they woke up in the morning they would think about Matt and feel grateful to be alive. What would you have to say to those responsible for your child’s death? Would you get some sort of compensation by putting them to death? Or would you have thhe strength to let them live, just as Matt’s dad granted? Dennis’s speech to the courthouse thirteen years later truly represented how most parents would feel losing a child to a hate crime. However, some parents might not have been able to express their feelings the way he did that day.

Although Judy Shepard did not present a speech to the courthouse, she used her son’s awful death to inspire her. Judy and her husband founded The Matthew Shepard Foundation. She constantly travels around the world to encourage people to “embrace diversity and erase hate.” The foundation acts as a (place) to share stories that will make a difference. It coordinates “fundraising and educational events across the nation,” while also sponsoring other similar events. The foundation has grown tremendously and therefore been able to produce its own public service announcements. These announcements serve to educate families, communities and America about the need to replace existing hate with “understanding, compassion and acceptance.” Often when one loses their child, whether to a car accident, gang violence or a crime like this, they tend to shy away from the world and hold their frustrations and sorrow inside. Judy Shepard changed her lifestyle when she lost her son. She used inspiration from Matthew’s short life and his story to teach thousands the importance of acceptance.

It’s because of parents like Dennis and Judy that we have the government getting involved to support ideas for a better America. Just recently, President Obama signed a bill that would make it a “federal crime to assault an individual because of his or her sexual orientation or gender identity.” The bill was named for James Byrd Jr. and Matthew Shepard. Foundations like the one Judy Shepard created, are not only supporting citizens with similar stories, but they are actually making a difference in the laws that all Americans must abide by.

Dennis and Judy had a beautiful son who, by biological chance, happened to be gay. When Matthew Shepard was killed because of his sexuality, his parents took charge of their lives in honor of their boy. Dennis expressed what a wonderful child Matthew was and how he was proud of his accomplishments in such a short life. He granted life to those guilty of taking Matt although he could have, and even wanted to, out them to death. Later, Judy founded an organization dedicated to “embracing diversity.” She traveled the world to share her story, Matthew’s story. Because of parents like Dennis and Judy Shepard, America has been taking steps towards acceptance by passing hate crime laws. These individuals dedicated themselves in hopes for a brighter tomorrow, where hate crimes like the terrible one that took Matthew’s life, will no longer exist and people will love one another despite race, gender and sexuality.